I would like to tell you that at this point in the year I am on track for my goals of 2017. I would be able to explain my new diet, detailing all of the processed foods and carbs and sugars I’ve cut out. I would show you my new workout routine with some fitspo phrases such as “you’re lapping everyone on the couch”. I would be feeling great and energized and have a brand new sense of optimism with exceedingly (almost annoying) positive outlook for the days to come.
I would like to tell you all of that but I can’t.
The truth is that I am on day 21 of being stuffy nosed and foggy headed. It’s because of this lovely upper respiratory infection turned sinus infection that I have not been able to work out one time since January 1st. I have been doing the best I can to eat well but lets be honest, when you feel like this you just want easy to make comfort food. So all of my “resolutions” have been put on hold until after I can get in to the doctor and hopefully get my health back on track (Wednesday).
What’s funny about all of this is that my healthy eating and working out resolutions were not the point here. And as I sit here and rethink (to the best of my ability) the last few weeks I can’t help but laugh to myself because until now, I’ve been so wrapped up in my resolutions, my goals and my way of getting to my end goal that I didn’t see His goals and resolutions for me.
As I sit and reflect on these things that seem to be horribly off track I am seeing a parallel of things that are coming together and it’s absolutely magical. A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with God on a particularly difficult morning. Looking back at it, it could have been spiritual warfare at play but I’m not going to jump to conclusions.
Anyway, have you ever just woken up crabby for no reason? I did. I woke up and felt heavy like there was a dark cloud around me. I was snippy to my fiance before I left for work. I was dreading work. I was just miserable and cranky for no reason at all. So I decided to talk to God about it. I simply asked him to help me to shake the crabbies. Help me to not roll my eyes so much today and to keep my snarky remarks to myself so I didn’t offend or hurt anyone. That day I got to work and saw a wonderful volunteer opportunity posted online. My church was looking for volunteers to help them host a woman’s shelter, through the month of January. What a great way to help! So for some weird reason, I reached out to someone very close to me that is notoriously disinterested in church. Why God prompted me to reach out for rejection on this particular day, I’ll never know but I reached out and this person was excited to help and now both of us are volunteering at the church to help the women in our community that need a warm place to stay on a January night. Mood immediately changed. Mic drop! God knew exactly what my spirit needed and He provided. He tested my faith in asking me to reach out to this person. He tested my spirit in giving me this opportunity on a day that I felt like I couldn’t even tie my shoes without having a bad attitude!
Recently there has been someone very close to me (a different someone than above) that is going through something so challenging that I cannot even begin to imagine standing in their shoes. I have been trying extra hard to be the positive in this person’s day, even if it’s just a quick text to tell them that I love them or that I am thinking and praying for them. I have invited this person to church with me on several occasions and been met with warmth and love each time. I try to pour into them about the love and fulfillment I get serving others (oftentimes through church but not always) and putting God in the center of my storm. On a coffee date over the weekend in conversation this person told me that they were coming to church with me and they would meet me before service. It almost stopped me in my tracks because I’m not used to someone meeting me unless I organize it. I was so excited! “Yes of course! Meet me at 8:45! I’ll be there!” While at church there was an announcement about the “Community Connect” event. This event is a large event for the members of our community that need help getting clothes, haircuts, jobs, a meal… It’s a free event held at a local school campus. I have volunteered before and loved it. The person that came with me to church that day couldn’t wait to sign up to serve at this event. “Wait, what? You want to sign up?” This person is a great and loving person but they are busy. So their interest and availability to serve surprised me! We ran over to the Next Steps table after service and signed up for a time block of volunteering.
It’s funny that each year we think about our resolutions for ourselves and there is something so much larger happening. This whole time, it hasn’t been about how I can change and live better for me; it’s always been about how God can use me to bring others closer to Him. That’s what’s happening here, isn’t it? Through my time spent serving others and speaking from a place of love and kindness others have been drawn in to serve others and hear His word during times of trouble and hurt. This is no greater “resolution”, is there?
“God is a safe place for us” – Psalm 62:8